Feeling CRAZY insane or nuts
Our natural psychological protection
Understanding these unsettling feelings helps. Hopefully, it is a temporary issue. A few hours to a day can be quite natural for some small to moderate internal blocks. If the feeling of being crazy, unhinged, insane goes for longer consider making contact with a professional or myself. The online Laws of Grace or Correct Presence Practice courses have meditations where you are guided to sit and hold Presence with stuff that is arising. Holding uncomfortable feelings is the Master's skill. You can also inquire or work with these feelings to dig out what the fear is. Working with your emotions and mental baggage is a skill that grows. It's important to feel these emotions and not suppress or deny them (Law Zero).
The Laws of Grace course has specific step by step videos on how to evaluate your mental and emotional states. The aftercare section in the course covers issues like this that are not discussed much by spiritual teachers. Many of these issues are related to Awakening only and help on these is often difficult to find. It will explain things to do, monitor and actions to help resolution.
If they are happening then be Present with them as best as you can. This is the key to freedom and inner peace. Some shifts in consciousness do take time to settle. To shift the survival instinct is not an easy process. It’s called the survival instinct for a reason, it's designed to keep you alive and safe. Feeling bad or crazy is a way to keep you in the old behaviour or emotional pattern. This is the reason bad habits, especially destructive ones can be very difficult to shift.
Psychological parts & integration to Awakening
Psychological parts, soul fragments or gestalt's, as they can be termed always have an intended outcome for you that is deemed good to keep you safe. The problem is that aspect of your inner psychological process is disconnected from your Presence, your whole you. This part has fewer resources to deal with situations than the whole of you does.
To use metaphor; the part, gestalt, behaviour pattern or belief structure is like a slice that has been cut and removed from the whole cake. The cake when whole has all the resources for more behavioural options. When these separated aspects of your consciousness are close to reintegrating back into the majority of you they may put up this fight to keep you safe in their view. You are the crab, or snake that is about to shed an old skin and become something bigger.
Even when you have been blazingly permanently Awake for over a decade, when you integrate or grow into a deeper level of Presence and Awakening you may still have this crazy dichotomy happen. It is a great sign that you are growing as a human into something more expanded and Awake. I would be curious to have feedback sent to me if anyone who has grown significantly into deep states of stable Awakening if they have never had this happen. This is a great research question.
Apply logic, You are a separate human? Yes? You have separate beliefs, behaviour patterns and fight-flight responses within your own psychology. All of these are parts. This process of re-union happens within you to deepen into Awakening. There is (No7) always more for the vast majority of people. I can't say I've met anyone who hasn't (tbh) more stuff to integrate. It's still a process even for the lucky super-advanced few. The spiritual myth that you'll Awaken one day and it's just endless ease and bliss is a total fairy tale that many seem to hold onto as a No8 blind spot. One word makes this obvious; pandemic. The pandemic was a leveling field to see how real our Presence was (and is while it is still happening).
Feeling crazy and insane after Enlightenment
The spiritual evolution process is endless. Normal Enlightenment here is defined as phase 3 Abiding Presence. In Jungian psychology, it is also known as the completion of the Individuation process. This is the first phase of real Enlightenment. If you move towards the deeper Grace-based 2nd cycle of Enlightenment the Transpersonal cycle of phases 5+ you will face these issues again, but it will be amplified. As discussed in the phases 5+ page, to become Transpersonal means your psychology opens up to experience more unity. This unity is experienced as you, the person, yet these others are certainly separate things and people. This can only happen safely if your stability in Presence is rock solid. That means that your ego or psychological boundaries as a functional human are stable and strong.
If you ever have glimpses of Transpersonal Awakening it is extremely Divine but the ego/personality will find it very disturbing and incomprehensible. These glimpses can happen at any time. I personally had thousands of these in the fourteen years before my Abiding Awakening. Many hundreds of these transpersonal unity experiences were very early in my journey in the 1990s. Back then I was still totally embroiled in being a lost broken person in my 20s. These intense spiritual experiences were truly devastating as they triggered depression and bouts of suicidal feelings. In that space, there was no separation so the veil of death vanishes. When that true freedom is experienced the human the veil of separation vanishes, it is very brutal contrast. These deep unity, transpersonal experiences, are quite a dichotomy to hold within your personal psychology. This is why I consider this page and the suicide page as very important, it's not discussed much in spiritual circles.
This is why I severely caution against the use of Class A drugs. Drugs rip open our psychology and create massive damage. Drugs violate the prime directives of your unconscious mind without your volitional conscious control. The fallout can be long lasting and the craving to have that false drug-induced unity experience back. The emotional pain can be as bad as losing a beloved partner /family member. I've listened to many people over the years about the damage drugs did when used for their spiritual search. The Laws of Grace course has an extensive video on this drug use topic as to why drugs are not needed and what the inherent problems are with their use.
Real Awakening is a habit, one where you remain psychologically and physically safe. It is earned either way, there is no way around it. Even spontaneous awakenings, like Eckhart Tolle or Ramana Maharishi had resulted in severe dysfunction. Either way one has to learn to be functional consciously with Awakened Awareness. Learning that functional capacity is what the Laws of Grace are all about. Grace is 100% reliable, when you are ready God will jump in as fast as She can to properly Awaken you.
As I discuss in the Transpersonal page video when real Transpersonal Awakening hits it is a long process of acclimatisation. The state of being Transpersonal will be ongoing for many years. The tests one will face are tougher than the original struggle to become Abiding in Awakening at phase 3. There is simply no free lunch for extra spiritual goodies without earning it consciously through experience and habit formation. As of now in 2022 I am in my 6th year of phase 6 non-Abiding Transpersonal. This is the longest period in one phase since I started the Presence path journey in 2003. I went from phase 1 to phase 3 in five years by comparison.
Remaining functional as a human requires the ego. Ego is the boundary structure so you can function in human society. Jumping the queue to higher phases of Awakening results in dysfunction if the proper integration has not occurred. Feeling the crazies is part of this natural process. I hope this page helps you understand this. I've not heard this spoken this way before. Book a coaching session if you need assistance with this sort of issue.
Structure of Awakening
Pillar No7 applies: Structure happens regardless of levels
Watching the evidence of what works and what does not will show the Laws of Grace all follow a structural process. Master the habit of structure, not information, beliefs or content. The current issue (and entire phases) will repeat the same structural process. The layers of change and attainment and how our system works from spirit to our DNA all follow the core structures and processes. This is the basis of framework pillar No7 and why it's so critical to understand this even after you are Blazingly Enlightened.
This is why after decades of stable Enlightenment your mind will never get it, but your mind will know that this is how it works even as it feels crappy and cannot understand the Grace of Presence and the Divine.
How do you master the structure? Simple, learn the Laws of Grace (God's rules) and implement it so it becomes a habit. Laws Zero is your compass to truth and the feedback process. The core multipliers in the Laws of Grace are the math of how much you deepen from your current level of consciousness to the next. To understand your Unconscious Mind and work with the prime directives (rules of the mind and psychology) means you can assist habit growth and psychological issues the fastest.
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